No Go Kpai Yourself…Prioritise What Matters

To make progress in life, you need to be quick to forgive yourself for your perceived 'failures'.

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Well, hello there!

It’s a beautiful Sunday evening outside as I write this.
My daughter is still asleep, a well-deserved siesta as she's tired from the party she attended yesterday while her dad and I try to catch up on some work before she wakes up and we have to get back to work being parents. Is your day much different than mine?

Anyway, week 7 of my 90-day challenge has been one of those weeks where life took over in unexpected ways and gave me many firsts; my first speaking engagement, my first time writing new styles of stories and poems, and my first week during my challenge where I did not walk for 4 days. 

Between delivering my first-ever speaking engagement on Monday, attending hospital visits on Wednesday and Thursday, and making sure my daughter was all set for a party on Saturday, there simply weren’t enough hours in the day to check off every box. And you know what? That’s okay. Sometimes, we need to give ourselves grace and prioritise the things that truly matter. And for me this past week, the important things were what I focused on achieving.

Life isn’t perfect, and neither are we.
At different points during the week, I felt like I had failed by not going for those walks. I had too many things competing for my time but I still felt like I was failing myself. Do you ever feel like this?

This is not the first time that I’ve experienced a packed schedule. But I’ve also not put as much pressure on myself as I have to see this challenge through. So this felt different. In the past, when things got overwhelming, I used to try to remind myself that being human means making adjustments, especially when bigger responsibilities come into play.

This week, I had to do just that while prioritising the things that were once-in-a-lifetime opportunities, like speaking on a panel for a virtual conference, and important health commitments like my annual medical check-up. All of these were still successes and I had to enjoy them.

While I didn’t go for my walk every day, I was still able to focus on something I love—writing.
Like I mentioned I would in last week’s letter, this week, I experimented with new forms of storytelling. I wrote my first-ever drabble and sonnet. Huge success for me since I could only afford about an hour or two at most to research and learn about each style before I tried my hands on practicing them. Goes to show that even when one part of my routine slipped, it didn’t mean everything else had to as well.

It’s easy to get caught up in a to-do list or feel guilty when we don’t meet every goal. But we only have 24 hours each day, and there’s a limit to what we can accomplish. Prioritising our health, mental well-being, and important responsibilities should always come before checking off tasks. I know this, I just need to do a better job of reminding myself of it.

Another thing I need to do a good job of reminding myself is…
Forgiving myself for not being perfect or for missing a few goals here and there is an important part of achieving long-term growth. Self-compassion and flexibility are just as important as dedication and discipline. We can’t beat ourselves up for missing a step here and there, especially when we’re prioritising things that truly matter.

Sometimes, life will require us to shift focus (like it did for me this week). During those times, the real success is in how we adapt, how we give ourselves room to breathe, and how we keep moving forward without letting guilt hold us back.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed,
If you feel like you’re juggling a million things and not making progress fast enough, take a step back. Remember, you’re doing your best. The tasks will always be there, but your mental and physical health should come first.

Life is unpredictable, but that doesn’t mean we’re failing. It means we’re adjusting, evolving, and learning how to be resilient.

As I head into Week 8,
I’m reminding myself that balancing the important things is more important than ticking off every item on a list. To maintain my sanity while giving my best to myself, my family and my work, I need to know when to push and when to rest. Best of all, I need to permit myself to focus on what truly matters.

I hope you learnt something from my week.

I hope that these letters not only share details about my life but teach you important life lessons that we can often overlook while in the trenches of everyday living.

I hope you can embrace the same mindset I am building. Give yourself the grace you deserve, and keep moving forward with intention and purpose, no matter how your week unfolds.

Remember that:

"Nobody's life is ever all balanced. It's a conscious decision to choose your priorities every day."
- Elisabeth Hasselbeck

Thank you for being part of this journey with me. Until next week’s letter, have an amazing life!

With Love,
Rae.

Favourite Things This Week

The Tortoise and the Antelope: A Fable

The message I wanted to explore is one we all face daily—balancing how we use our time. Whether it’s work, family, or personal pursuits, we’re constantly making choices about where to direct our energy. Read more...

A Nation’s Heartbreak – A Lyric Poem

For the first time, I’ve attempted to write a lyric poem. This particular piece was born out of a profound sense of disillusionment with Nigeria and its leaders that I’ve been feeling for a couple of years now. Read more...

Absent in My Heart’s Most Precious Days – A Sonnet

I wrote a poem that touches on a deeply personal subject: the grief of losing a father too soon and the heartache that comes through all the “firsts” he never got to witness. Read more...

Before you go🤚

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Cheers,
Rae.

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